Bike Stealer

My wife had been encouraging me to get a bike for some time.

Though I love the outdoors and spending time with her, I have pasty-white skin and sweat more than your average Joe.

But I love her and spent the next few weeks perusing Facebook Marketplace, looking for a solid enough bike that wasn’t too expensive and was big enough to handle my longer legs. After tire-kicking around a few options, I found Lamar, who was willing to part with his old and slightly rusty 26in Schwinn for $85. Perfect!

I drove the 15-20 minute trip to the address he gave me, parking on a side street. I’d moved the seats forward in my already crammed-full sedan and was excited to take my potential buy on a new test ride.

I walked up to the entrance of the apartment complex and messaged Lamar, letting him know I’d arrived and was waiting at the front of the building. He replied, saying he’d be coming down shortly with the bike.

A few moments later, a young man came trudging down the steps carrying a bike. His hands were full so I opened the door so he could step outside unhindered.

“Lamar?” I asked.

“Ummmm, Seth?” he replied.

Dumbfounded, I took out my phone to ensure that I read the name correctly on the Marketplace posting. I couldn’t get to it fast enough and felt the awkwardness of the situation settling in.

“Ummmmm, okay never mind then…” I continued.

I started looking the bike over to see if it was worth the purchase. I grabbed the handlebars and started investigating the bike’s integrity.

“Hey, I’m noticing actually… the bike doesn’t have any front brakes,” I stuttered.

“Look man, I just live upstairs.”

Ahhhh, it must be his roommate or kid then. That’s where the mixup came from probably, I figured.

However, at this point I was quite confident that this bike was nothing like the other one I had seen on Facebook. I wasn’t sure what else to say, but before I could get more words out, Seth interjected.

“I’m just trying to bike to work!”

My face turned crimson red as I started to bust a gut laughing. This poor kid was just trying to leave his home so he could bike to work at the gas station down the street when some random guy stops him and tries to steal his bike.

I explained myself quickly to the kid what was going on and we both started laughing together. A few moments later, I let my hostage carry on his way to his teenage job. Minutes passed and the real Lamar came downstairs with the actual thing. Relieved, I mustered up all the courage I could to not try to steal another bike. After a quick test drive, I CashApp’ed the $85 to Lamar and went on my way with an embarrassingly humorous story to tell.

If this story had taken place years ago, there’s a better chance I wouldn’t have wanted to tell anyone about it. When your identity is based on your ability to mentally ascend, never lose your marbles, or constantly have it all together, you’re likely not to laugh very much.

Scripture is full of and written by doofus’ who seem to make a sport out of screwing up. One of the most famous of them, Paul, said it like this:

⁹ But he said to me, ^j“My grace is sufficient for you, for ^kmy power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that ^lthe power of Christ may rest upon me.

Paul’s in good company. Being a Christian should involve a lot of laughing at ourselves, as our present state is wholly determined by Christ’s work on the cross rather than our own boot-strapped-put-togetherness. When the Christian realizes that they have nothing to prove, then they won’t act like they have anything to prove.

So the next time you screw up, even badly, feel free to mourn and repent. That’s a great thing. But shortly after, “boast all the more gladly” and laugh along with Christ and His great love for you. That’s the sufficient grace our world so desperately needs.