‘How can I be less critical of myself?’

Steve Brown:
“How can I be less critical of myself?” The answer to that and other questions, on Key Life.

Matthew Porter:
Welcome to Key Life. Our host and teacher is Steve Brown. He’s no guru, but he does have honest answers to honest questions about the Bible. God’s grace changes everything, how we love, work, live, lead, marry, parent, evangelize, purchase, and worship. So, here’s Steve and Pete Alwinson from ForgeBibleStudy.com with street-smart Bible teaching for real life.

Steve Brown:
Thank you Matthew. Hey Pete.

Pete Alwinson:
Hey man. How you doing?

Steve Brown:
I’m doing really good. I’m, you know, I keep thinking the other shoe’s going to fall. I’m still doing good and still trucking. And that’s kind of a good thing.

Pete Alwinson:
That’s a very good thing.

Steve Brown:
That’s Pete Alwinson, by the way. And as you know, for over 25 years, Pete has come into this studio, and we’ve sat down, and we’ve answered questions. 50% of our answers have been totally 100% accurate. 50% have not been. And we’re not sure which is which, so you’re going to have to study your Bible. By the way, if you haven’t, be sure and go to ForgeTruth.com you’ll be absolutely amazed and you ought to listen to the podcast from Forge. Tell me the name of the podcast and when you do it.

Pete Alwinson:
Forge Truth podcast, every Monday a new edition. Just go to your podcast and go to ForgeTruth.com and we have one with you. They have got to hear that one.

Steve Brown:
Now, they can get that from any podcast provider.

Pete Alwinson:
Right. Right.

Steve Brown:
All right. That’s not bad. So, check it out, you’ll be glad you did. By the way, we love your questions. You can send them to

Key Life Network

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in Canada, it’s

Key Life Canada
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or you can e-mail us at [email protected] and if you can, when you do, help us out financially. If you can’t, we understand. But if you do help us, I promise we’ll squeeze every dime for the glory of God. Pete, why don’t you lead us in prayer and then we’ll get to these questions.

Pete Alwinson:
All right. Let’s do it. Father, thank you so much as we come into your presence today that we can bow before you. It’s been a long week. And that we could bow before you, stop, and remember that you are God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, the Triune God, the one who created us, the one who redeems us, the one who sustains us. We praise you. And Lord, we’re not going to lie, it’s, there’s, not everything’s been great this week. But we know you are in charge and that you’re good, and we simply ask you to enable those things that have happened to us and in our lives to be turned out for your glory and our good and help us to wait on you and do what we should in the meantime. Father, you know those who listen and you know the needs of every one of us because you are sovereign and you are infinite and you are good. And so, hear are great need for you right now, financially, emotionally, for healing. Lord, you know us and we come running to you. And now Lord, we ask that you’d be with our pastors and teachers and priests and leaders. And all those that really are going to stand in front of us and bring us into the presence of God this week-end, be with them, use them in a powerful way and all to your glory. And now, we ask that you bless this time of Q&A, and thank you for Steve and the rest of the voices here at key life and all those who do so much behind the scenes for we pray in Jesus’ name. Amen.

Steve Brown:
Amen. Let’s go to our phone lines.

Caller 1:
How can I help prisoners? How can I help police officers? How can I teach myself to be a lot less critical of me?

Steve Brown:
That’s good. You know, we know the two areas where you’re critical of you. You’re not going to help and affirm and hold up the arms of police officers. Nor are you doing that with the prisoners. So, you’re hard on yourself. So first, you’re forgiven. You know, we really sometimes, don’t we, in terms of police officers, they are under fire all the time, and we need to be, as Christians, we need to affirm them and thank them. I’ve taken, when I see a police officer, I say, or somebody that’s in the service. I say, thank you. I just want to thank you for what you do for us. And if I say it that way, it really affirms them and it helps them.

Pete Alwinson:
Oh, it does. You know, like when you’re, if you’re out riding your bike and you see a police officer doing traffic or something, salute them, give them a thumbs up.

Steve Brown:
That’s right.

Pete Alwinson:
What my son does is if he’s in line in a fast food place and there’s an officer standing here, he’ll buy him lunch. He’ll stand there, he’ll just buy their lunch.

Steve Brown:
That’s so good.

Pete Alwinson:
And, you know, I think that is, and think we can do a lot of, we could take food to him. We could go, there’s ways to just be practical about that.

Steve Brown:
You and I both have a friend, Reggie Kidd, who is here, and he and his wife. They went through a really difficult time when their baby was salvaged because the police stepped in. And she, every year, bakes cookies and takes them to the police officers. That’s kind of cool.

Pete Alwinson:
It’s so cool.

Steve Brown:
And listen, if you really want to make a difference in a prison, I suspect your church or a lot of Christian organizations near you have ministries in prison and find out how you can volunteer, how you can help, because they’re always looking for somebody who can help.

Pete Alwinson:
The Good News, good News Prison Ministry is one of them. I think it’s national.

Steve Brown:
Yeah, it is. And it’s great.

Pete Alwinson:
Absolutely Steve. Those are great things. And. It’s real practical in American culture right now because our service industry in that area, they get so much criticism, not so much firefighters. It’s the police that has been roundly criticized.

Steve Brown:
That’s true. And you obviously, because you put those questions together, feel guilty. Listen to me. If you never help a police officer, or never go to a prison, God won’t love you any less than he does right now.

Pete Alwinson:
That’s right. That’s right.

Steve Brown:
And if you become a full time affirmer of police and working in prisons, God won’t love you any more then he does right now.

Pete Alwinson:
That’s right.

Steve Brown:
I’m just saying.

Pete Alwinson:
Yeah, right. So let that grace energize you to pick one of those areas and go after it. I don’t think, and of course prayer, you could pray for these guys every day and that’s a big deal.

Steve Brown:
That’s good. I agree with you. Here, this is an e-mail. What’s the harm in a Christian dating a non Christian?

Pete Alwinson:
Yeah, I know. What do you think?

Steve Brown:
Well, I think if we have to tell you, then you’re living in a crazy universe because the most important thing in your life is not the most important thing to the person you’re dating. And dating can lead to marriage, and you can end up married to the wrong person for the rest of your life because Jesus won’t let you get a divorce.

Pete Alwinson:
Yeah.

Steve Brown:
So there.

Pete Alwinson:
Yeah. I mean, that is great. I think of that, go to II Corinthians 6, and it’s verses 14 and following. And Paul’s real clear. What does light and dark have in common? We just simply don’t. And I would say not only is it, you’ve got to be careful about dating a non believer, but you’ve got to train your kids as they get older and older and start moving in that direction toward dating that, you know, there’s a, that they’ve got to choose carefully. And date Christians.

Steve Brown:
You know, I’ve, a number of times have had friends of mine who were dating non Christians and fell in love and realized that they couldn’t marry them. And so, they went to their boyfriend or girlfriend and cried and said, We have to break up. I can’t, I can’t stay with you. And I’ve seen on a number of occasions that pagan becomes a Christian.

Pete Alwinson:
You know, it can happen. It really can.

Steve Brown:
Yeah, it really can.

Pete Alwinson:
So, we’re not denying that.

Steve Brown:
No, we’re not denying that it can go in that direction, but man, we would spare you, not because the non Christian is an awful person, or you wouldn’t like being with them, or anything like that. Just because you’re setting yourself up for major problems.

Pete Alwinson:
That’s right. That’s right.

Steve Brown:
Later on.

Pete Alwinson:
It really is.

Steve Brown:
They really do. They really are. So, just don’t do it. Can someone who has deeply sinned still serve God?

Pete Alwinson:
You know, I did breakfast with a brother today who feels like he hears these voices say he can never really be used in ministry again. And of course we can be forgiven. And of course we can be used to be pulled back into advancing the kingdom, of course. But grow through your failure, right?

Steve Brown:
Sure, it has to change. But I, you know, the better way to put the question, can somebody who is deeply obedient, serve God? No, cause nobody is.

Pete Alwinson:
That’s right. A hundred percent obedient.

Steve Brown:
Man, I understand that. I mean, do you know what’s happened to me one time? And he, God knows better than to let it happen too much, but in my worst sin, I’ve preached my best sermon. And I, and I get out of the pulpit and say, man, if I were you God, I wouldn’t have allowed that to happen. That was so good. And God said, just don’t take advantage of it. I wanted to show you something really important. I deal with sinners and you sinners. And if he can use Paul, who was the chief of sinners. He can use you and me.

Pete Alwinson:
That is great. Don’t make it normative, Stephen.

Steve Brown:
No, that’s not a goal.

Pete Alwinson:
I can hear that. Don’t make it normative, Stephen.

Steve Brown:
Yeah, right. What does the Bible teach about tithing? We’ve talked about this a number of times.

Pete Alwinson:
Yeah.

Steve Brown:
Are we still required to tithe?

Pete Alwinson:
You know, the New Testament builds on the Old in this regard. I would say that tithing is never discontinued. So, whatever is not fully, clearly discontinued is still in force. But the New Testament builds on all of that and says you’re bought with a price. God owns you. God owns everything. And tithing is a great starting point and a good baseline principle.

Steve Brown:
It really is. It’s really helpful. Not because it has anything to do with your salvation.

Pete Alwinson:
Right.

Steve Brown:
Or anything else, and he lets you keep 90%, good night, what do you want egg in your beer?

Pete Alwinson:
That’s stunning. Right? I mean.

Steve Brown:
That’s true.

Pete Alwinson:
And that’s actually a great way of looking at it.

Steve Brown:
I agree with you. You know, we incrementally increased it when we were young. We just didn’t have any money and couldn’t pay bills. And increased it a little bit, until a friend said, you can’t do that. Take a risk and jump into that pool and we did. And I’ve never missed a meal.

Pete Alwinson:
Yeah. Amen. And that’s great. Trust God. Can’t out give God.

Steve Brown:
That’s true. And guys, time for us to leave, having done all the damage we can. But first, Key Life is a listener supported production of Key Life Network.